Do you love me more than these?

Today's scripture reading is on Ezra 6-8 and John 21. I do enjoy listening to the scripture while reading along the passages. Biblegateway.com is particularly good to provide not only all kinds of translations and powerful search features, it also has the "listen to" feature.

I am preparing for a long trip in the next two weeks. This mission is to do a show and tell of an Electronic Medical Record (EMR) software to officials in Vietnam and funding agencies from the US to manage and assist the care of HIV positive patients and drug addicts in that country. This EMR has been developed by my university as a free and open source software (FOSS). Our intention is to help them not only in using the free software, but to demonstrate the benefits of improving care for this population. Even though I have done these kinds of trips many times, I still get jittery prior to the trip.

So today's scripture reading is particularly helpful. The Book of Ezra is a very encouraging book to read, especially when one is experiencing the pressure of working under difficult circumstances. Who can imagine that the powerful King of Persia (Darius in Ezra 6:1-11) would write a decree to continue reconstruction of the Temple in Jerusalem, specifying financial support and supplies for the temple services. This political move gave King Darius and his successors the support of the Jewish priesthood but the result is the bringing together of God's people to worship their God, even though they were captives in a foreign land. It reminded me of Joseph's words in Genesis 50:20, "You intended to harm me, but God intended it for good to accomplish what is now being done, the saving of many lives.".

In the famous post-resurrection "breakfast on the beach" story in John 21, Jesus asked Peter three times if he loved him, perhaps to correspond to Peter's denying him three times prior to his conviction and crucifixion. The first time he asked Peter (this happened after breakfast of BBQ fish and bread Jesus himself prepared!), “Simon son of John, do you love me more than these?” (John 21:15) to which Peter answered, “Yes, Lord,” he said, “you know that I love you.”. Then Jesus gave him this commission, “Feed my lambs.”. I have the following reflection:

(1) When things are going well, do I still love Jesus like I did the first time?
"Praise the Lord, my soul,
    and forget not all his benefits—
who forgives all your sins
    and heals all your diseases,
who redeems your life from the pit
    and crowns you with love and compassion" (Psalm 103:2-4)

(2) Do I love him more than what the world has to offer me?
"Do not love the world or anything in the world. If anyone loves the world, love for the Father is not in them. 16 For everything in the world—the lust of the flesh, the lust of the eyes, and the pride of life—comes not from the Father but from the world. 17 The world and its desires pass away, but whoever does the will of God lives forever." (1 John 2:15-17)

(3) It is interesting that the Lord addressed Peter as "Simon son of John" rather than "Simon Peter". He is no longer Simon the "rock" (which is what the word Peter means, the name Jesus gave him), but merely a human son. Do I love Jesus with all my human frailty? It is interesting that the word "love" Jesus used was "ἀγαπάω" or often referred to as agape love - a sacrificial type of love; whereas Peter's response was "φιλῶ" the love of natural emotion, and even tender, intimate, personal affection. Regardless, I must learn to love Jesus regardless of my many failures and past experiences. It's okay to respond to Jesus' infinite, sacrificial love with Peter's type of love - "Yes Lord, you know that I love you". Yes, Jesus is Lord and he knows my heart, even though my heart can be finicky and uncertain.

(4) Jesus' commission is for me too! "Feed my lambs" is clearly a metaphor very easily understood by Jesus' disciples in their days. They were shepherds and fishermen. It is clear that it had meant more than just telling others about the good news. The feeding and nurturing would require complete investment in the lives of those who belong to God's household. Lord, you know that I love you. Help me to spend my life in the lives of others so they too would learn of your sacrificial love for them.